September of last year marked five years since I packed my bags and left my home country Kenya. A lot has happened since then. For one, I am a permanent resident in England now. Does England feel like home yet? To some extent. The dream to move back home eventually still lingers somewhere but doesn't shine as bright as it once did.
In the five years, I have had periods of high highs and very low lows. I have learnt so many things through experience and observation. I will share some of my learnings with you in no particular order.
Work is Important. So is rest
Many of us were motivated to move abroad in pursuit of financial independence, making work a top priority. People often work full-time and take on side jobs. The UK government restricts side gigs to 20 hours for certain VISAs. However, during COVID, due to a shortage in healthcare, this limit was lifted. During that period, I worked more shifts than I ever imagined, sometimes reaching 60-hour weeks. As expected, after several months, I experienced burnout. Nowadays, I occasionally work extra hours, but I have become protective of my days off. Rest is crucial, and enjoying life's pleasures is equally important. This way, you not only maintain the energy for work but also a desire for it.
Budget and Plan your Finances
Money flows in and out. Even though the nursing salary is nearly ten times what I earned back home, the cost of living is just as high. Before moving to England, I thought I would have plenty of disposable income. Besides rent, there are other expenses to cover, such as electricity, gas, internet, phone bills, and vehicle tax, among others. Childcare is another significant cost. Ultimately, it boils down to being frugal. Many of us have to share accommodations with roommates to save money. What we envisioned as a life of spending and luxury turns us into budget-conscious individuals. The key to reducing stress is to live within your means and plan carefully. Invest any extra income however little.
Boundaries with Black Tax
As soon as people realised I was abroad, I began receiving requests from every direction—long-lost friends, former colleagues, distant relatives, and even strangers. Initially, I felt a sense of responsibility, almost a savior complex, and I sent money indiscriminately. To be honest, during the first few months, we were shielded from the true costs of living because we stayed in hospital accommodation with subsidized rent and no bills. The reality hit when I moved out of this accommodation. I understood the need to establish boundaries, even with my immediate family. I have learned to decline financial obligations that inconvenience me or have me stretching my budget unless absolutely necessary.
Keep in Touch with Friends
Maintaining adult friendships can be challenging, especially with the added difficulty of long distances. Fortunately, technology bridges the gap, enabling us to stay connected more easily than ever. Texting, phone calls, and video chats help us keep in touch. Yet, it's common to become absorbed in work and life's demands, causing us to overlook old friends. It's crucial to be deliberate and make these friendships a priority. Connecting with people who truly know you and share your cultural background is deeply rewarding.
Keep in Touch with Your Roots
Returning home always brings joy. When I see the lights below and the pilot announces our approach to Nairobi, I often feel a surge of childlike excitement. If traveling often isn't possible, connecting with your culture locally is a great way to stay in touch. I've visited a few Kenyan restaurants and get to enjoy food and music from home. This ensures that even my son will understand his heritage. Fortunately, my husband and I come from the same country and tribe, so we frequently speak Swahili and Dholuo. In addition, I am in groups with Kenyans where we share stories and ideas authentic to us.
Build a Community, However Small
Creating a new community around you can be intimidating. You're meeting individuals from various cultures, and finding common ground can sometimes seem impossible. Nonetheless, life continues. You'll have milestones and moments when you want to celebrate or mourn. It's essential to have people to share these experiences with. Unfortunately, many of my friends who are nurses relocated to the UK and ended up in different cities. Meeting up occasionally is often difficult due to work and other commitments. This necessitated building a community with those nearby. Attending church has been very helpful, and I've also formed some relationships at work. As the saying goes, no man is an island.
Soak in Some of the Culture
One of my favourite things about England is English breakfast. It is delicious and filling. I also enjoy tea and biscuits, jacket potato with tuna and christmas dinner. I watch a lot of British TV as well and keep up with some politics. Initially, I was unbothered by the culture or my surroundings. With time, I have taken interest. I don't feel out of place all the time. In fact, I can easily make conversation in the supermarket line or with a chatty patient.
Take Every Opportunity for Career Development
Recently, I came across an article on LinkedIn by Cate Mimi discussing the paradox of career advancement in the UK. I share her view that in the UK, a larger job or role doesn't always translate to more money in the bank. Additionally, as your earnings increase, so do your tax and National Insurance contributions. Despite the less-than-ideal financial rewards, any chance for growth and learning should be embraced. Take advantage of any courses your unit offers. The Florence Nightingale Foundation provides edifying courses for Internationally Educated Nurses. Be bold and aim to climb the ladder. Pursue Band 6, 7, 8 positions if possible. Transition to your preferred specialty. After two years in medical surgical nursing, I chose to move to Critical Care. I plan to focus on this specialty and eventually shift to education, where my passion lies.
Do your Driving Test when You Don't Need a License
I will not say much on this. Just that getting a practical driving test in the UK in some towns is like finding a snowflake in a blizzard.
Enjoy the Journey
Ultimately, life is meant to be lived. Make the most of it by enjoying yourself. Dine out. Take vacations. Pamper yourself whenever you can.
I love your Blogs Getrude